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Married to an Addict? How to Get Help

Aug 11 2025
Categories:Love and Relationships
Tyler Collins

A married couple is having a session with a therapist about addiction

If you’re married to an addict, you may feel that you're at loss on what to do. Maybe you’re hurt, scared, or just exhausted. You love your partner, but their drug or alcohol addiction is tearing your marriage apart. You may ask yourself, “Is this ever going to change?” or “Am I doing the right thing by staying?”

You’re likely managing parental responsibilities, dealing with emotional distance, and maybe even covering for your partner’s drinking or drug use. These aren’t just bad habits. This is substance abuse, and it affects every part of your life.

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In this post, we’ll talk about whether your marriage can survive addiction, how to talk to your partner about getting help, and what your options are. You’ll learn how addiction treatment works, including types of therapy, and how to take care of your own needs. This information can guide you toward healthy coping mechanisms and the support you need.

Can My Marriage Survive If I'm Married to an Addict?

Being married to an addict means living in survival mode. One moment, things seem okay. Next, you're dealing with lies, withdrawal symptoms, or the fallout from another relapse. A spouse's addiction affects your trust, finances, safety, and emotional health. Sometimes, your spouse's substance abuse even brings domestic abuse, physical abuse, or sexual abuse into the picture. You might feel guilty thinking about maybe initiating a divorce process, but you’re also not sure how much longer you can live like this.

If you're still willing to hold on, the good news is that yes, your marriage can survive, but only if things change. It takes effort from both of you. The addicted partner has to accept help for the substance abuse problem.

You need to stop making excuses or covering up addictive behaviors. And both of you will need to do the work through therapy and support, addressing addiction. That’s not easy, but it is possible. The good news is, there are treatment programs that involve both partners.

Substance Abuse Treatment

Your addicted spouse needs substance abuse treatment. This may include detox, medical attention, and rehab. Treatment centers like Anaheim Lighthouse in Orange County offer personalized care for drug abuse and alcohol addiction. These programs are built to help break the vicious cycle of illicit drug use or alcohol abuse.

Behavioral Couples Therapy

Behavioral couples therapy helps both of you learn better ways to communicate and rebuild trust. It’s especially helpful when involving partners in the recovery process. You’ll also learn how to set healthy boundaries, provide mutual emotional support, and stop enabling behaviors that make things worse.

Individual Counseling

Seeing a counselor can help you process your own pain and stress. For the addicted individual, it gives them a place to understand what led to their substance use disorder and how to move forward.

How Do I Convince My Partner to Go to Rehab?

A married woman crying over her husband's addiction problem.

Convincing your addicted partner to get help can feel impossible. Many people in addiction live in denial. They may say they have it under control or that things aren't really that bad. You might hear excuses like “I’m just stressed” or “I can quit anytime.” But abusing drugs or alcohol isn't just a habit. It’s a serious illness that needs real support.

Start by sharing your concerns without judgment. Use real examples of how their drug use or alcohol abuse is affecting your family and your relationship. Keep calm, and avoid yelling or blaming. Let them know that people don’t need to hit rock bottom to get help. Offer to go with them to speak to a treatment professional, or suggest a visit to a support group like Alcoholics Anonymous. Sometimes hearing it from someone else makes all the difference.

What If My Addicted Spouse Refuses Help?

If your addicted spouse won’t agree to get help, you still have options. Start by protecting yourself and your kids. This might mean setting boundaries, talking to a lawyer, or looking into the divorce addiction process.

You are not giving up. You are making a choice to survive. Lean on family members, look for a support group, and keep your psychological well-being a top priority.

How Do I Take Care of Myself Through This?

Living with someone who struggles with substance abuse issues takes a toll on your overall health and well-being. You may feel like you've lost yourself. Start by choosing to practice self-care. That can mean getting rest, seeing a therapist, exercising, or spending time with friends.

If you need to, protect your finances. You might even need to separate your joint bank account. Staying emotionally and physically safe matters. You cannot help your partner if you are falling apart.

Best Addiction Treatment Rehab in Anaheim, CA

Being married to an addict is incredibly hard. But there is help available to treat your partner's substance abuse issues and any co-occurring mental illness.

Anaheim Lighthouse Treatment Center in Orange County offers full alcohol and drug addiction treatment services. That includes couples therapy and family therapy as part of a personalized plan. Whether your goal is to heal together or to move on healthily, real help is available at our addiction recovery treatment facility for both you and your spouse. You deserve peace. Reach out today and start the recovery process.

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